Thursday, May 25, 2006

The Difference a Day Makes

Thurs 7:40am

Now, I’m an early morning person (my internal alarm clock goes off somewhere in the vicinity of 5:30 - 6:00am every morning, The snooze button works maybe once a week) and my day normally begins with a slow wake up in front of my computer. After checking my email, reading a few comics that I frequent and doing a little goofing off it’s a shower and then off to wherever I am going for the day. This is normally done by 7:30 at the latest.

This morning after my shower I realized that it was going to be a good day. It’s Thursday, I get to see two of my ‘grown up’ high school kids from Santa Barbara, lead worship, and pick up the keys to my new apartment. All in all it should be a good day.

So then what is the difference between seeing a good day and a bad day coming. Monday looked like it was going to be a good day as well. A morning of quality worship, many of those who were gathered there thanked me for just the time of worship as opposed to another morning of usual routine. I went to class slightly exhausted, as I normally get when God has used me, and things are looking good. After class I run into a good friend of mine and for all the joy that she had in the morning she got sideswiped by a wrecking ball, eighteen-wheeler, and the Titanic in one blow. Good day to bad day.

On the other hand I can remember many a bad day that turned out for good. In college the youth group was putting on a large scale outreach event: 130ish kids planned to show up, 4 inflatable games, BBQ, music, etc etc. I was in charge of food and BBQ, cause I’m like that. So I trade out my 2 door sports car for a 2 door truck to move all the food, I am at Costco by the time they open, and load up around $200 worth of food in to the back of my buddies truck, by myself. Go to drive the food to the church and the truck doesn’t start. The engine doesn’t even try to turn over. So I go get my car (same parking lot) and try to jump his car, no luck.

$200 of food + broken truck = not cool.

I start making phone calls looking for another truck and help moving the stuff. I need another truck because the BBQ we are going to use looks like someone cut a metal barrel in half, welded a frame around both ends and then put a grill on the top. Very cool, needs a truck to move it. By this time I have gotten over panic mode and am really just starting to enjoy and see every single irony that was happening. Quite literally I was missing every singly light, I had to drive behind every slow driver that was passing another slow driver who was passing a semi, the list goes on.

4pm rolls around and I finally have everything set up, fire started and kids should start to show up around 5ish. I was supposed to have precooked the burgers and have been done cooking around noon - 1ish. Band practice is done and the inflato-games are being delivered. Music and message yields about 40 kids coming up to accept or rededicate themselves to Christ.

There is no such thing as a good day or a bad day, not until it is over at least. But rather moments and chances for God to use our gifts, abilities, and our time for his glory. How we react to the trials in our lives builds our character and shows those around us what type of person we are. If my cynical, sarcastic, depressed mood had kicked in on that day there may not have been as many who would have come up to accept Christ. The attitude that we show affects those around us, even if we don’t realize it.

9:30 pm

It was a good day, I'm tired, packed, and I think I'm going to have another fun day tomorrow.

Monday, May 22, 2006

Introduction/Worship

The funniest thing about attending seminary is that only now am I being tested in what I believe. Granted I have had no Systematic Theology classes or church history to build a foundation on, but at the same time I have even less time to truly sit down and consider the whirlwind that has been the past two months. I’ll get to that another day.

What is worship? Worship is normally accompanied by the word ‘praise,’ but is it limited to just that. I have been told on more than a couple of occasions that I am a ‘talented’ worship leader, most of the time it is shortly after leading worship for Seminary Chapel or on a Sunday morning when, in my opinion, everything ‘came together.’ Yet for all the flash and spiffy things that happen during worship it means nothing to me if there is not an encounter with God.

This morning I led worship in chapel for the entire time period that we had. Afterwards I received high fives from about 5 people and nods of approval from others. I knew that it had been a time of sincere worship (mostly due to the fact I was exhausted) and that joy and peace had come down and rested upon those that needed it.

For all of these things I do not know if I could trade places with anyone worshiping in the chairs and find the same joy that I do when I lead. When Matt Redman wrote the song The Heart of Worship it was not just a normal songwriting experience. A year earlier he was at the top of his field and was beginning the well-known Soul Survivor movement in Europe somewhere (I think it is more in England). The head pastor commented that most of the church was too addicted to the music and banned music and singing from the church for a year. ‘Worship’ took on a whole new meaning where there was time of testimony, speaking, drama, prayer, and silence. At the end they truly had discovered the heart of worship.

On such a small scale how does one rediscover the true meaning of worship? A term that has risen out of the same Soul Survivor group is that of ‘Lead Worshiper’ as a replacement for worship leader. The more I lead the more I realize that this is true. One cannot evoke emotions in others through forcing it upon them, but rather if one leads sincerely others will follow. “Come follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.” In some respect those who are worship leaders have missed out on what it means to worship in an effort to focus on getting others to go where they themselves do not tarry.

If you ask me to lead worship, I will show you what I do when I worship in my own house. Should you say I did a good job, you will find that I am as big a dork as the next person, and that my guitar skills are not amazing. Should you tell me that ‘I’ inspired you, I will tell you that I am simply a servant and child of God and that I have no power of my own, it is Christ who strengthens me.